Ballad of Bob and Mike

(To the tune of "How are things in Glocca Morra?")

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How are things today in Durham,

Is the Herald Sun still published now?

Does Bob Ashley still have Nifong’s back?

Finding excuses like a faithful hack,

He's the "bull", Nifong's his sacred cow.

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How are things today in Durham,

Bob and Mike still joined up at the hip?

Bob’s running to deflect each blow,

Slap down that naughty N&O:

They should keep their muzzles zipped!

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Bob must rush and prop up Herr Gottlieb,

Doesn't want this nasty stuff to ruin his "leave."

Forget about the Blinco's mess!

As for those Dukies...ARREST! ARREST!

Let's do a story that is sure to please.

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You'll never hear Bob finding fault with Mike,

Why everything that D.A. does he likes!

Guess he dug the cabbie trial?

Those slick line-ups made him smile?

Those Duke kids just aren't worth the fight?

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How are things today in Durham?

Don't expect ole Bob to risk his neck.

That's not what journalism is for...

A trial could make circulation soar!

If they're tried…Bob could sell papers by the peck!

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When the Hoax falls apart in Durham,

Will the Herald Sun survive?

Remember, Bobby never took a stand,

Propped Mike up and held his hand…

Will you want that paper laying in your drive???

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Joan Foster

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Ashley Strikes Again

Gottlieb's Apologist