A Man cannot escape his Fortune Cookie

The place-card by the won-ton soup
Said it was Dickie’s chair.
The delicacies kept coming
But Dickie wasn’t there.

The dignitaries shook their heads
His absence was so odd.
He had been watching CNN
Then shouted out ...“Oh GOD!”

The Face that launched his Apology Tour
And a million faculty smears
Had just been indicted...MURDER ONE
The culmination of Dick’s career.

Up to his lovely room he ran
The blot slipped in the door.
(Friends say when things upset him
He’s “hid”like this before.)

He lay there on the hotel bed
He felt...”more sinning against than sinning”
Should he make like Charlie Sheen?
Call Steele and exclaim... “WINNING.”

No...His tummy was tied up in knots
Why he could hardly breathe..
So he just wrote down ... GREAT BIG NUMBERS
Then multiplied...by 43.

Joan Foster

INNOCENCE DAY REDUX

They called two minute warning
We sat up in our chairs.
Most of us were praying.
All of us were scared.

Talking Heads were in agreement,
He‘d say “Not enough” at best.
No politician would say more than that!
One minute now..or less.

Now Cooper’s at the podium
First few minutes seem like days
We hear the word..."dismissal."
“They are INNOCENT" , he says.”

“THEY ARE INNOCENT!!!.”
We’re gasping!!! Then..Nifong is a “rogue.”
We’re euphoric! Now FINALLY
The whole World knows...”what we know!”

The talking heads are reeling
The metanarrative explodes!
Graceless Goslee has a hissy fit.
(Girl can’t stop the venom flow.)

Rita Cosby takes her last shot.
Ole Travis tries one more lie.
And somewhere out in Durhamland,
Widdle Mikey starts to cry.

Rev. Barber tries an end run
The “victim” card gets one more play
Greta calls out the ADA’s
(But will Cline be Durham’s next D.A.?)

Now we see the families
Tears of relief and joy!
Then, exhilarated, exonerated…
FINALLY, the boys!!!!

And so the Frame was fractured
The Rogue would be disbarred
(But the Fed failed in its duty
With villains, unfeathered and untarred.)

But Justice may yet have its day
And Truth may wield its sword…
Some rats still ride the sinking ship
But some have scurried overboard…

But today we pause and celebrate
Three young men …with EVERYTHING ahead
Here’s to dear Collin, Reade and Dave!!!
“Innocent! INNOCENT!!!...he said.

Joan Foster

"Shut down that silly website"

Good Morning President Brodhead!
Yes, the papers have been filed
We’ll shut down that silly website.
Now… let’s see your happy smile!

No, they cannot pollute the jury!
They cannot speak ill of Duke!
We’re not some…. helmeted student athletes!
Right, Dick…“It’s not about the truth!”

And no, Dick, it’s not hypocrisy
Don’t listen to those fools!
Who say we never, ever broke a sweat
As Fong polluted … Durham jury pools.

Sure, we COULD have called out Nifong
On his “Wall of Silence” scam
We COULD have demanded fairness
Reined in Mr. “Chokehold-Man.”

We COULD have told potential jurors
Nifong wasn’t always playing straight.
But it was all so ..well, unseemly
So much outrage! So much hate!

We could have asked our Angry Studies
To just shut up and teach
And quit writing hostile op-eds
But, when THEY SPEAK…well…it’s FREE SPEECH.

Yes, an exchange of noble discourse
In the local Durham press
And , if it inflamed the raging locals
But, dear Dickie, I digress…

We DEMAND a level playing field!
Well, because…because it’s US!
We cry out, “SHUT down THAT WEBSITE!”
Or we’ll make a legal fuss!

These people are so clueless
What’s that you say, Dick? Yeah, “forsooth”
Last time it was THEIR reputations
This time , my God..it’s DUKE!

And if that jury did convict those kids
Appeals would make that “oops” seem funny.
Last time it was only just..young lives and jail time.
This time… Dick…dear God..it’s MONEY!

"This is a parody and a product only of our imagination, as no prestigious University would ever act that way!"

Trust and Betrayal

My dearest friend, of twenty years standing, doesn’t trust me. She’s quite open about it. It hurts and frustrates me at times, because during those twenty years I’ve never broken faith with her: I’ve kept her secrets, supported her in the hard days of raising teenagers and losing her mother. I’ve held her in my arms in the days after her melanoma was diagnosed. She and her adoring husband are like family to my husband and me. But she doesn’t trust me. It hurts and frustrates me…but, you know what? I understand.

Years ago, she had a FIRST Best Friend and a FIRST “Adoring” Husband…her college sweetheart, the father of her three little boys. This First Best Friend was her tennis partner and confidante, shopping buddy and shoulder to cry on. They shared a little motor home the two families vacationed in together and babysat each other’s infants. This First Best Friend kept her secrets and supported her in those hard days of raising toddlers and losing her father, and she held her in her arms when, at age thirty two, her breast cancer was diagnosed. This First Best Friend was a true “forever friend” for sure.

A year later, my friend walked in on her First Best Friend entwined in the embrace of her First “Adoring” Husband. There was an uproar, and divorces, and heartache, and gradually a kind of healing. Eventually there was a wonderful new husband and devoted new friends. All should be behind her, right?

Sadly, even after all these years, she doesn’t trust any of us. Even though she tries, she says, "You never really recover from that kind of betrayal. It’s always with you. It becomes a lens you see the world through. And the betrayal of those you trusted most is a burden THEY put on YOU that you never get to put down."

Likewise, my husband knows a man who helped his down-and-out buddy get a job at his firm. My husband’s friend was on the fast track, but a few years later he became the target of some nasty office politics. Luckily, he thought, his buddy (that was so eternally grateful to him)…. had the “evidence” to back him. But, instead, “old buddy” chose to use that moment to advance his own best interests in lieu of the truth. It’s been many years, but a few too many glasses of wine occasionally brings this old betrayal bubbling to the surface of this now very successful man’s consciousness.

He’s still bearing that burden of old betrayal too.

Now, suppose you were eighteen or nineteen. You go to a party and overnight you become the target of racist hate groups, frenzied feminists, angry activists' marches and vigils, Wanted posters, and CASTRATE! signs. An unrelenting media camps out on the family lawn, while Nancy Grace, Georgia Goslee, and Wendy Murphy enrage a nation NIGHTLY with endless ERRONEOUS details and outright lies. An ambitious, immoral prosecutor repeatedly tells the world you are either a savage rapist or a liar protecting savage rapists, and everyone believes him.

EVERYONE BELIEVES HIM.

You are helpless.

This is impossible to get your mind around, because you’ve never been hated before, really hated. You’ve never witnessed a lie with such FORCE. A lie SO MANY PEOPLE WANT so desperately to be true.

You’re a kid.

And this is happening not just in your school, or city, or state. You stand, despised and disbelieved, on a world-wide stage.

Think of it!

You need to take exams, but it’s not safe to sleep in your rented housing. In some cases, though the local papers run photos of palatial homes, your parents are just hard working people who cannot afford to house you elsewhere. So maybe you sleep in the car or stay on a couch. They stick your home address on hate sites, and you're terrified for your Mom and Dad and your siblings. What if some crazed stranger thinks your little brother is you? There are lawyer fees, and long distance trips, in some cases doctors' bills, and (I’ve heard) an average of over $10,000 per innocent family just in the early days. People hate you. Really hate you.

To those who claim the unindicted players didn’t suffer much, I ask you: Have you ever endured a worldwide, day and night, UNRELENTING, hellacious witch-hunt like this? Have you ever been its target? Has your child? Can you imagine the FEAR? Have you ever been the victim of just an average lie? Remember the frustration? Remember how it felt? Remember your helplessness? Now..imagine…imagine... being the target of a vicious lie on this scale. A lie that brings life destroying consequences and lunatic death threats. A lie that some folks love so much that no facts…. NOTHING… can convince them of its fallacy. This lie is like a sports team with ardent fans cheering it on, needing it to win FOR THEM!

Can you imagine?

You’re a kid. You’re afraid. But you don’t completely despair. Why? Because you KNOW the truth, and you believe in the truth, and you believe in the integrity of those who can help you GET THAT TRUTH out into the public. You believe in the police, the professionals, your professors and the top people at YOUR University. You believe in Duke. It’s what you hold on to…you believe in Duke.

You believe these are honorable men and women, Duke men and women, who will surely want the truth exposed as much as you, as much as your Mom and Dad. These are honorable men and women you can rely on in this maelstrom of malice, because surely they would not have risen to such positions of authority at such a fine school if they did not each possess moral courage and profound integrity.

They are your trusted port in this terrible storm.

If they tell you, “Don’t tell your parents”…you don’t. If they tell you, "This lawyer is all you need "….it must be true. If they tell you, "Meet with Gottlieb"...they are looking out FOR YOU. If they tell you, "We believe you, your championship season won’t be canceled, this will all go away"…. if they tell you, when they tell you…..whatever they tell you, you TRUST.

Until you walk in on the stunning realization one day that every last one of those at Duke you mistakenly trusted have been, from the beginning, entwined in the slimy embrace of Durham’s "rogue prosecutor" and its derelict police department.

If the facts in this third lawsuit are true, Duke was no wallflower, content to just avoid the terrified families and the inconvenient truth. Nope, no more than shy, soft-spoken Crystal Mangum was “new to dancing” and lost her shoe fleeing these hooligans in virginal despair. No, Duke was a deceiving hussy…forcing its own police force to change witness statements to prop up Pole Dancer's and Rogue Prosecutor's lies. If true, Duke was cunningly aware of the medical discrepancies that Duke Hospital nurse Tara Levicy was allegedly re-creating to suit whatever contingencies Nifong needed. If true, Duke was smug and silent while the “Blue Wall of Silence” smear might have been readily and truthfully debunked. If true, Duke was giving a knife-in-the-back on background, while appearing on the record always so demure and distressed by its own widdle, biddy, Dukie burdens it had to bear. If true, the leadership of Duke evidenced the duplicity of a Platinum Club pro, hidden behind the Dukiness of their own privileged Top-Guy positions. They did nothing as their activist faculty relentlessly and publicly attacked their own students. They allowed it, like some cheap date enjoys a drunken brawl in a bar. And these supposed paragons stood silent, passively watching the terrible mistreatment of their students, while, at the same time, they had irrefutable facts proving THEIR STUDENTS WERE INNOCENT.

If true, how incredibly shameful. How despicable.

Harvey on our Board suggested the lawyers ask the jury if they personally had ever been betrayed, even in the more common, more usual way. Had they ever been the target of a lie? Like my dearest friend, had they ever had to face the awful reality that those you trusted and respected and even revered had sold you out for their own needs and selfish gratification.

Had they endured the betrayal of:

The malicious lying neighbor.
The boss who steals credit for your work.
The co-worker who sabotages you.
The spouse who cheats on you.
The so-called friend who sells you out.

Betrayal.

Make that jury own the frustration, the helplessness. They’ll get it. Big time. They’ll understand. We all do.

Duke University, it is alleged, had to choose between exposing an inconvenient truth or embracing and enabling a life-destroying LIE. Like that lying neighbor, that underhanded boss, that treacherous co-worker, that cheating spouse, that turncoat friend…. they knowingly betrayed these kids in a cold-hearted way we can all feel in our gut.

If true, it was the ultimate betrayal, the most horrific treachery of Duke’s responsibility and trust, and if the evidence should reveal them naked in bed, entwined with Nifong,…. every alumni, donor, parent and decent human being needs to open the door, look hard, and see them exposed.

Joan Foster

"Best For Duke"

I’ll admit to having been fascinated by the Scott Peterson trial…this seemingly “normal” young man with his pregnant lovely wife. How did those last horrific moments come about? What did he say? What did she? What was in his mind as he watched her die? I would wonder how he rationalized snuffing her life and the life of his child? If one could ever get the truth from him, what would he say? What was he thinking? How does someone like this form a personal defense… even to his own self?

Nowadays I think this same way about Robert Steel and Dick Brodhead. What’s the emotional and moral make-up of folks like this? I’ll confess I’ve never met either of them. I bet they are charming at cocktail parties and impressive in their insular little world, okay…fine. But everything I ever needed to know about either of them, I learned , if true and accurate, in the written summary of the third lawsuit.

Let’s start with Steel. Jason Trumpbour relays a conversation with Steel that just might be the most stunning moral indictment of the current Duke leadership to date. Now, stay with me here. Trumpbour tells us Steel felt it would be best FOR DUKE if Collin, Reade, and Dave…WENT TO TRIAL. Best for Duke. Say that again: “BEST FOR DUKE.” If convicted, he shrugged, “it would all be sorted out on appeal.”

Who thinks like that?

What kind of man thinks like that?

I can’t even type that without stopping to take a deep, outraged breath. Imagine you are the Finnertys, or the Evans. Or the Seligmanns. Your child, your boy, already scourged, and branded, and sullied by an outrageous LIE, would best serve the University’s interest by going TO TRIAL, perhaps being convicted of a felony and imprisoned in some hellhole. This is the measured, moral opinion of the chairman of the Board of Trustees at his school. It would be BEST for Duke for your INNOCENT child, your ravaged family to endure a TRIAL. And let’s remember the backdrop of this time: the Black Panthers, well represented , no doubt, in our prison system, shouting at Reade “You’re a dead man walking!!!” Sure, Chairman Steel, let it all be sorted out on appeal.

BEST FOR DUKE. He can pull these three young lives out of the equation, discard them, and focus on what’s BEST FOR DUKE.

Wow! That Chairman Steel!…he gives new definition to being a “company man.” And Brodhead, the subservient, self-serving lackey. Duke parents and alumni, you can’t say from here on, you don’t know the quality and moral compass of your leadership!

So what does that say about how Steel ( and his willing sidekick Brodhead) perceive the worth, the humanity, the reality of the lives of Collin, Reade, and Dave? Are they expendable for the PR purposes of Duke? Is it much more INSTITUTIONALLY important in the mind of Chairman Steel to prop up a life-destroying LIE so that Duke appears even-handed and sensitive to Durham’s homegrown strippers and lap-dancers? In lock-step with Durham’s cracker-jack, dump-burning governing entities? Supportive of the “castrate” sign- carrying, racist- diatribes of its activist professors? Why Chairman Steel should have just run a spot on local TV and made his message plain:

“ Hi, I’m Bob Steel, Chairman of the BOT of Duke University and I approve this message:

In the best interests of Duke University, to show our inclusiveness and reverence of even drug-addled, mentally ill prostitutes; our fear of our activist faculty; our guilt-fueled submissiveness to the local political intelligentsia; and our heavy duty P.C. credentials …. we will aid and assist D.A. Nifong in railroading three innocent students of ours and besmirching for life the reputations of their teammates. We and our employees will accomplish this by ignoring and/or suppressing or even ALTERING when we must any exculpatory evidence to the contrary. Like the local newspapers, we will also try to level the playing field, by ravaging the “histories” of these young men to try to bring them down to a level where the Lap-dancer /deranged former felon /and prostitute will appear their moral “equal.” To that end, we will empower commissions to uncover anything and everything negative that we might hand the media to envelop these boys in that stain. We will opine that “whatever they did was bad enough.” We will cancel their season and start a “Mea Culpa” progression around town, mournfully apologetic for having these young privileged men in our midst. We will turn our eyes away from any and all violations of OUR OWN conduct codes as long as the objects of these violations are these young men of the wrong race and income group. We will refuse to meet with their terrified parents or read the defense files that might force us to confront their ABSOLUTE INNOCENCE. We will look on mute while our faculty radicals ravage them in print from ad to op-ed over and over again. Proclaim them “farm animals” and let our silence speak approval.


We will do all this in the best interests of Duke University. To send to the world and our student body, through our actions, a moral imprint of what the leadership of Duke University considers the new expediency, the new righteousness. Here is our blueprint for what’s really important for those who aspire to assume the helm of any business. It’s not people, it’s not the lives of three young men or the reputation of forty-plus others. It’s PR and PC. Public relations and Political Correctness. It’s IMAGE. It’s that thin layer of false veneer we’ll protect NOT with OUR LIVES OR LIVELIHOODS, oh no! But those of OTHERS!

It’s protecting our bottom line and our top guys at the price of those we consider expendable. The Coach, the kids. In the business world we can kick the small investor and the retiree to the curb in the holy name of our corporate interest; at Duke, it’s three white students and their white coach. That’s our lesson for the leaders of tomorrow: it’s BETTER FOR US if these three nothing, nobody, non –protected species kids go to trial… so-o-o-o, let’s help it happen. If convicted….Gee Whiz, no Biggie…it will be settled out “on appeal.”

How does that sound to you, Alumni and parents? Do you like what you hear from the top? Am I wrong? Okay, you give me another way to interpret those words between Trumpbour and Steel. Look at your child before you do. Think of HIM as Chairman Steel and his Lapdog Brodhead’s sacrificial lamb. “If convicted, it can be sorted out on appeal.”

“YOU’RE A DEAD MAN WALKING” they shouted at Reade.

I’ve really tried to think of an alternative take on Chairman Steel’s words. Not to excuse or defend him but just because they astound me. I don’t know people who think like this. Maybe I don’t move in the proper exalted circles.

Thank God.

How can the best interests of Duke trump three real young lives? How can the best interests of Duke require the suspension of all logic and common sense, the suppression of evidence, the submission to the mob? How can the best interests of Duke under the current leadership be only about artificial IMAGE…not about its students, not about the rule of law, and dear God, especially….” not about the truth?”

No parent or alumni can say “move on” until they can confront the awful reality of those unanswered questions. Until they absorb the consequences of the cold fact THAT THIS IS THE MINDSET of those who still remain in power at Duke.

I'm reminded of the last powerful scene in the first Godfather movie: the bereaved newly widowed sister, waving the newspaper describing the Mob hits , pointing at Michael Corleone, besseching her sister-in'law to face it all..."THAT'S your husband! THAT'S your husband!"

That's your Chairman of the BOT.

That's your President of the once esteemed Duke University.

"Sweetheart, you can't leave" ….until all you "Move-On Minions" confront the enormity of what was done to these kids.

Joan Foster

Missing Artiste

The morally superior, self righteous Left at Duke
Excoriated the Lacrosse Team with endless rancor and rebuke.
How vile to have these privileged sons view five minutes of the sight
Of a drunken, sex worker/mental case ( was it titillation, Duke? Or fright?)

But now they applaud and underwrite and hope our children to instruct
To embrace the artistic glory of a guy with a sparkler in his butt.
They encourage group arousal; gawk and titter , leer and drool
But NO, it’s not demeaning; sex workers make this a better school!

Hindsight is twenty-twenty…if only the Team had understood…
That it’s THE SPONSERSHIP that determines if simulated sex is good.
They might have asked for underwriting , instead of passing round the hat.
Had Brodhead bankroll the “Durham Duo”, swoon at Pole Dancer’s “performance art.”…

And where was Durham’s most famous artist , we belatedly inquire?
The darling of the 88, that role model to inspire?
What a curious omission; surely, one could find a grant.
So she could replicate her “artwork” , (perhaps to a Lubiano chant?)

Watch her writhe and mutter, Brodhead quoting from the Bard….
And when the Artiste retreated hastily, dispatched Moneta to take charge…
It could have been Dick and Larry, looking for the Shoe…
It could have been dear Brodhead, begging for refunds outside the Loo.

Where have all my assets gone?

Where have all my assets gone?
Long time passing
Where have all my assets gone?
Long time ago
Used to brag about my threads...
Very EXPENSIVE, (or so I said.)
Now I CLAIM "five hundred" bucks on the barrel-head?
When will I ever learn?
When will I ever learn?

Where have all my assets gone?
Long time passing
Where have all my assets gone
Long time ago?
Why yesterday my mouth ran and ran
“Priceless” music collection for Mike the Music Man
Now let’s not mention it if we can…
When will I ever learn?
When will I ever learn?

Where have all my assets gone?
Long time passing
Where have all my assets gone?
Long time ago
Thought I was clever but now I know
I’ll be outed by my own braggadocio.
I’ll OWE and OWE and OWE and OWE!
When will I ever Learn?
When will I ever learn?

Where have all my assets gone?
Long time passing
Where have all my assets gone?
Long time ago?
They’ll go lawyers, and Collin , Dave and Reade
Go to all I wronged with each misdeed
Just leave my guitar and bathrobe, please.
When will I ever learn?
When will I ever learn?

Hat Tip: Pete Seger

Little Drummer Person

Come they told me..pah rump-a pum-pum.
Some "Castrate!" signs we'll need...pah rump-a pum-pum.
We can't wait for evidence....pah rump-a pum-pum..
"Privileged" means NO DEFENSE!...pah rump-a pum-pum.
Rump-a pum-pum.
Rump-a pum-pum.

Our minds :programmed and closed...pah rump-a pum-pum..
Our metanarrative MUST be imposed...pah rump-a pum-pum.
Our profs...the eighty-eight...pah rump-a pum-pum....
Thank us (we didn't wait!!)...pah rump-a pum-pum.
Rump-a pum-pum.
Rump-a pum-pum.

Push hate with a new twist...pah rump-a pum-pum.
Only our side's RIGHTS exist! ...pah rump-a pum-pum..
Seize a chance to Crucify! pah rump-a pum pum..
(They don't bleed like you and I)...pah rump-a pum-pum...
Rump-a pum-pum..
Rump-a pum-pum..

Hollow,repetetive and numb..pah rump-a pum-pum.
My mind and my drum.

Discovery is Coming!

Have yourself a scary little Christmas
While the lawyers meet.
Next year, Lord knows, you may be living on the street.

Have yourself a scary little Christmas.
Discovery's what you fear.
Next year, Anna might be FORCED to get her rear in gear.

There you were in the olden days, emboldened in your ways... and lies!
Now naughty Meehan's unemployed, Nifong's been destroyed... oh my!

In your zeal to help the prosecution...
To prove your P.C. creds
We'll be learning ALL you DID and ALL you said.


"Honey, you can't leave!" the Hooligans say......
So have yourself a scary little Christmas Day!

You shouldn't have been naughty!

You better watch out!
You'll probably cry!
Brodhead's "very good year"
Imploded..Buh-bye!

New Civil Suits are coming to Town!

Brodhead and Burness!
Tara, Dean Sue!
Arico, Steele
And Moneta..woo hoo!

New civil suits are coming to Town!

All the usual suspects...
And some who thought they'd walked!
The gift that keeps on giving!
Who'll flip? Who'll turn? Who'll talk?

We'll be making OUR lists
Checking EVERYTHING twice! (UH-OH!!!)
We're gonna find out
Every naughty surprise!

New civil suits are coming to Town!

Naughty Not Nice

I saw Crystal kissing Santa Claus
Over at the Platinum Club last night
It was too cold to stroll
And they won't let her on the pole.
(Her fainting spells are making... their health insurance coverage fold.)

So I saw Crystal kissing Santa Claus
She looked so sweet just seated on his lap
As her false nails caressed his beard
She said... kissing strangers made her scared
Than suddenly, she took off... right into that Midnight clear!

Then I saw Crystal cursing Santa Claus
As she tried to hijack Santa's sleigh.
She accused him and three elves!!!
Or was it ten or was it twelve?
Rudolph almost trampled a policeman as Crystal whooped and yelled!

Then I saw Gottlieb collar Santa Claus
He said "Fool, your North Pole accent ain't no help.
Here the law is what we say,
Crystal NEVER has to pay
And the judges and the D.A.'s know just how the game is played."

Then I saw Judge Stephens sentence Santa Claus
And unless the Governor gives him a reprieve..
Christmas will be awfully glum..
Cause Santa was awfully dumb
Kissing...Crystal..at..the.. Platinum-m-m!!!

Move Over Rudolph

You know Wahneema, and Houston and Piot and Payne.
Eighty eight "Listeners", you know them by name.
But do you recall......
The most prominent "Listener" of all?

Brodhead the Dukie President
Listened when the Lynch mob howled
The Team's rights were so... expendable.
Best for us if they go to trial!

Brodhead the Dukie President
"Listened" at meetings everywhere
But when the parents begged to meet him.
It was safer to stay... unaware.

Brodhead the Dukie President
Shed Pressler like a worn out suit.
Wouldn't wait for facts or even testing
Listeners told him... "It's not about the truth!."

Brodhead the Dukie President
His "Listening" was so... correct.
But when the "evidence" was non-existent
Dickie wrote those three big checks!

But when the donations didn't fall and alumni dough came rolling in
The Board absolved him with their call, and said Dickie was a perfect Ten!

Now, Brodhead the Dukie President
Proclaims the Lacrosse case dead.
"Cash in Hand" trumps "Public Coward."
"A-OK" the Blue team said.

Happy Thanksgiving

At DNA Securities, they spit on Meehan's desk.
And a Church Hall gig's the only job that Linwood's gonna get.
Brodhead wears a tee-shirt that says "I'm a PC Chump."
And Victoria's election hopes are burned out like the Dump.

Barry's NAACP membership apparently is in doubt.
Tara headed for the Woods, Melanie boogie-boarded out.
While the Team Moms cook their turkeys, Ashley still is eating crow
And there are rumors, in months to come...more heads are yet to roll.

And Nifong, the disbarred disgrace, sits at home with Cy.
And only Best Bud Stephens can find a tear to cry.
Consumed by his own arrogance, ignorance and pride
He's left with time to ponder how he authored his demise.

And though some scoundrels still remain... and justice seems quite late
Today we count the victories, give thanks, and celebrate
For far away, at happy tables filled with family and friends
Dave and Collin , Reade and the Team give Thanks and say Amen!

The Missing Poems

Recently an undeveloped canister of film was located at LieStoppers HQ. The assistant to the artist formerly known as Joan Foster had failed to develop the film. Joan had been following the "Gottlieb Method" and instructed her assistant to take photos of her poems. We sent out the film and when it came back we discovered this poem dedicated to

President Richard Brodhead.


Cowhand Brodhead corrals the Duke Cash Cow.

Oh, he may be on the campus
The title's his for now
But Brodhead's a nervous cowhand
Hiding behind... that Duke Cash Cow.

For riding herd with Nifong
He's writing checks like WOW.
Brodhead is buying silence
Hiding behind...that Duke Cash Cow.

He thought of Larry Sommers
When the 88 began to howl.
Now he thinks... in millions
Hiding behind that Duke Cash Cow.

Just what did he give Nifong?
Stuff the law did not allow?
Is that why Brodhead's cowering...
Cowering behind the Duke Cash Cow?

Is this the Duke morality?
That Methodists and Board allow?
The CEO top secret pay-off?
Brodhead astride the Duke Cash Cow?

Well, Dick, that cow may buck you
Into the dust of that corral.
If the trail ride you took with Mikey
Shows what "bull" you've spread around

Dear Mr. Sharpton

It's me, Joan, from the Liestoppers blog. Sir, I saw you on a talk show. When asked about the disparity between the reaction to the Jena case and the Duke case, sir, you said "if asked" you would get involved in the Duke case.

So, Mr. Sharpton, I'm asking.

Sir, we need a federal investigation here. We need an engaged media. We need powerful politicans expressing their rage in photo-ops in front of the courthouse. You seem to be able to conjure all this stuff up at will. I'm going to be blunt here. We can't.

Mr. Sharpton, sir, we need you.

Oh, those Blog Hooligans on our board are fine, dedicated people. Our Quasimoto has had them writing and calling and petitioning and begging Anna Mills Wagoner for a federal investigation for months. Let me just quote The Beatles here: "No reply."

Sir, don't tell the Hooligans I said this, but they just don't seem to have what it takes. Their outrage just doesn't seem to count for anything on the federal or even state level. They have no power base, control no voting block, are nobodies in political terms. Nobody listens to them. Nobody wants to pose with them, put an arm around their collective shoulders, or claim their friendship. Not like they do with you, sir, and Jesse, and your other friends. They are voices crying in a political wilderness. Candidate Edwards couldn't hear them all this time... right there in the next town over. But, gosh, he hears your faintest whisper and shouts out FOR YOU. That Elizabeth Dole has been hard of hearing too. Even though she knew Dave Evans personally, she's been unwilling to claim the um-m-m acquaintance. But if YOU were involved, why, I bet politicos would stand right next to you, call themselves neighbors and dear friends of these fine youths, and eagerly take up the cause.

Sir, you are GOOD. No really. How do you do it? Six black boys in Jena beat up one white boy and politicians are climbing over each other to help those boys out. No one is demanding they apologize to their victim first. The feds are very publicly looking into it, and the Press is uniformly empathetic toward them. Yet, the lacrosse team endured a year because of a hellish, cold-blooded frame, and some Duke professors still spit on the ground and demand THEY apologize for the party. Yet, totally missing from those hallowed halls is any call for an investigation, accountability, or even a mild rebuke of Durham's rogue police department. It wouldn't be like that if YOU took up our cause. You could make a difference.

Maybe, sir, if YOU were involved, Ms. Lubiano would allow Dick Brodhead to pose for a picture and demand the rights our Constitution is supposed to provide for all for ...well...Collin, Reade, and Dave. Maybe your presence would move her beyond her "white innocence means black guilt" problem. Justice is supposed to be color-blind, right, sir? But let's face it. Dick Brodhead can't speak out demanding reform in Durham as he has done..oh, in other countries...unless he has cover with his faculty from someone like you. We understand that. Anyway, Quasi can give you his number. We know he would never REFUSE to meet with you. Calling Mr. Brodhead for us would be a good start.

Then, would you please call Ms. Wagoner and tell her you're warming up the buses? Tell her she'd better have the Feds on the way to Durham before you and yours make it into town. They'd be there waving as you arrived. We all know this.

Tell Bob Ashley he'd better have parking for them in front of the Herald-Sun. Call Barry Saunders and tell him to cut the cracks and have a couple hundred fish sandwiches ready for your marchers. Cash Michaels can help you set up a "Durham's Brother Connivers" venting website (he has experience in this). Tell Ruthie Sheehan to get her mojo back and use her column to demand sweeping reform in this corrupted, cave-mentality town.

Sir, flex that power that puts you on any media outlet at will and tell them, the audience, the country at large..that Reverend Al will not stand for a system of justice that supports a willful frame, suppresses the civil rights of three young men, and seriously undermines our faith and our future!!! Tell Them, Sir! Tell them that you will not tolerate leaving a system in place that denied Collin, Reade, and Dave their rights... based on their color and the supposed content of their Daddies' wallets. Inform them that Al...THE Reverend Al Sharpton... is in Durham till ALL people's rights are secured, the system scourged, and the guilty set to pay!

You can do this for us, sir.

You offered. And we accept.

Joan

Brodhead Morning Briefing VI

Good Morning , President Brodhead

Not to worry, all is fine.

Weintraub got the message

He's retreated back in line.

Lord, what was he thinking?

Has he recanted fast enough?

Thorne's words were there as warning.

Now his "voice won't count for much!"

Davidson gave him a model

For the way the game is played.

Anyway, he's pulled the comment

Dick, don't be afraid.

No, Wahneema hasn't called you.

Are those tears in your blue eyes?

Yeah, you and I have got these titles

But we know where the POWER lies.

No one must cross the Group Think

The Metanarrative must survive.

Faculty imposed Omerta

Yes, they depend on you and I.

Oh, those heady early moments

When in media and press

Faculty could smear with vigor

And we could smile with tenderness.

And mutter something vaguely

Oh, ...prove "innocence at trial."

And if convicted without evidence

Just appeal it in awhile.

We knew where our bread was buttered

Those kids had no "cache.

"Athletic, white, male, rich kids

There was nothing there to say.

They had no special status

No "listeners" to their plight

So it wasn't in OUR INTEREST

Their rights were not "our fight."

Oh, wait, Weintraub's in my office.

Clutching a Blue Devil mascot head.

He's screaming that he woke up

And found it...

Severed

In his bed.

Who's Sorry Now?

Who's Sorry Now?

Brodhead says he's sorry
When put to the test
His instincts were pathetic
And he bungled the rest.

Starn says he's sorry
Brodhead spoke of regret
They're all victims of bloggers.
(Vicious Hooligan set.)

While Holsti is sorry
The team mothers gave birth
And I am just sorry
Duke hires these jerks.

Joan Foster

Ole Hosti's Letter to the Chronicle

Brodhead apologizes, 18 months later!

"His moment is past. He blew it. He needs to go!" Joan Foster

Nighty-Nite

Hush, little Mikey, don't you cry

Joanie's gonna sing you a lullaby.

That shadow on your window is just some Fed

Tomorrow they might look under Mikey's bed.

Hush, little Mikey, close your eyes

Didn't one day in jail make you realize?

Stephens whimpering won't help next time.

Federal prison is real hard time.

Hush, little Mikey, you might get sick

Feds don't care if you're Marcia's "chick."

All her fudging can't save your skin

Feds gonna find all of Mikey's sin!

Hush, little Tara, you need your rest

All your "conclusions" gonna be addressed

Sleep, little Nurse-y, face your fears.

Just like those kids who faced THIRTY YEARS.

Hush, little Brian, if you can't count sheep.

Count all your lies till you fall asleep.

Count all your alibis, and if that fails

Count all of Crystal's "unidentified males."

Hush, little Linwood, sing a gospel song

My, how you helped Mikey's frame along!

Feds are digging, you need repose

Bet whither Mike goest, thou will go!

Hush, little Markie, in your pajama coat

No, all those case notes can't be unwrote.

The "moving finger" moves right past you.

Feds gonna finger little Markie too.

Hush, little Ronnie, Mike's "A-OK"

Where will Ronnie be when Mike's led away?

Hush, little Pat, too late for crying

You assured us YOU were "supervising."

Hush, little darlings, do you hear that sound?

That's the Big Ole Fed-dies snooping all around.

Sleep at home, little darlings, while you may

Feds gonna bring Durham's Judgment Day.

Nighty-Nite.

Joan Foster

Joan Foster comes out swinging!

This morning the News-Observer published a column by staff writer Barry Saunders.

They seek payback, not pay

"Only a heartless misanthrope would argue against giving something to the dear, sweet former Duke lacrosse players who have been through such an ordeal.

Why, I think one of them even spent an hour in custody -- not in jail, but waiting for a magistrate to finish his lunch so daddykins could post bail.

The players are asking for $30 million. That seems a bit high for the inconvenience they suffered, but they certainly deserve some recompense. After all, the strippers they hired didn't even finish their hootchy-kootchy dance.

How about a compromise figure? Instead of $30 million, how about a fish sandwich, a Yoo-hoo and a one-way Greyhound bus ticket? ..."NewsObserver

This caused a fury in Joan and she quickly responded to him.

Dear Barry,

Take a deep breath, squeeze your eyebrows together, and try to think a big, big, DEEP thought for once.

Okay, try again and keep on trying until it comes to you. Once you've done it a few times, it's not hard.

Barry, it's not about the thirty million.

Duh.It's the Discovery, Stupid.

It's the discovery that will rip the dirty little lid.... off the dirty little Old Boys Network.... in the dirty little town of Durham. Watching the synchronization of cops, judges, and Durham officials, as they constructed the dirty little frame against Collin, Reade and Dave last year, has left many of us breathless with rage. But this isn't about rage or revenge or raking every last bit of revenue out of the city coffers .

No, Barry, this is about RECONSTRUCTION. The reconstruction of a judicial system, a police department, and a city government that currently reeks of cronyism and corruption.

Did you see Judge Ron ("He's A-OK") Stephens blubbering on the stand last week over his bestest buddy Mike Nifong's problems? Or Judge Marcia ("It depends") Morey hedging under oath and then hovering over Nifong like a hen with a chick? With the intensity of this incestuous local system proudly on public display, Barry, are you really convinced all defendants are assured a fair trial in Durham? I mean, Barry, the State is the richest Daddy of them all. You were content in your columns to let these three sons of privilege sweat it out...but what about the sons of poverty, the sons of single Moms and the sons of "Barely Subsisting"? How are they to handle the grifters with a grip on the power in your town?

This is about THEM. Not Collin, Reade, and Dave. This is FOR them. And for all who have been victimized before and will surely be victimized in the future. You and many Durhamites have been content to subject your sons and your neighbors' sons to the status quo. Mark ("Magic Notes") Gottlieb is still prowling his beat. Patrick ("Only One Story") Baker is still on the payroll after Hoaxgate, having also survived Leadgate and Dumpgate. Not one other Durhamite filed a similar Nifong removal motion, following Beth Brewer's courageous lead.

Maybe you were out replacing the feather in your fedora, Barry, but I missed YOUR meaningful contribution. There has been no accountability, no self-correction, no cleaning of the cesspool too many of you locals contentedly swim in. Why was it you never stood up to the sleaze, Barry? Was it inbred apathy, fear of reprisal, or, as Mike Nifong saw it, a golden opportunity for self-advancement? In any event, you just let it be.

But that's about to change. Sorry you didn't have the grit or the gumption to do it on your own.

No, Barry, this is a line in the sand for all those folks... poor, black, brown, and otherwise... who couldn't stand up to the bullies in blue; the wolves in white shirt and council pin; the back-slapping boys in black robes and their favorite, duly-elected district attorney, Mike Nifong. This is FOR THEM. This is to put a stake in the heart of the shameful, sickening abuse of power that dominates the smug and the powerful in your town.

Let them be deposed.

Better yet...let them be EXPOSED.Fully, completely, and finally exposed.

This is better than the Feds, Barry.

The Godfather might tell you...Durham has been made an offer it cannot accept.

It's about the Discovery. Any settlement is secondary. Since you locals never had the courage to clean house before... consider the tax hike to come...well, just like you hired a BIG, BIG Cleaning Team to come to town, disinfect and remove the Trash. Durham deserves better than this. And, Barry, when you won't do it yourself...sometimes you just have to PAY to get it done.

Durham can never compensate Collin, Reade, and Dave for the stain on their names or being shackled with a lifetime of abuse from the "Something Happened" crowd. But making an example of Durham's complicity in the wrongdoing in this case may help eradicate the cronyism, corruption, and contempt for our justice system that affects others unable to help themselves. It takes courage to take that on. These three families have it. Your sarcasm, insensitivity and lifetime of inaction shows you lack the conviction or the CHARACTER to even grasp the concept.

Keep swanning around the cesspool in your snazzy hat, Barry. Whether you approve or not, somebody's about to see it drained.

Joan Foster