Alone in da War Room

For What?

."I believe we serve the university best by serving the news media well. It's in Duke's enlightened self-interest to work effectively with the media. Invariably there will be negative stories. One of the questions you always have to ask when you have a negative story is how to keep it a one- or two-day story as opposed to a one- or two-week story. The best way to do that is to be direct, to be honest, to be transparent in discussing it...

"The general value system of a university should suggest that it's unafraid to discuss controversial issues, even when those issues may be perceived as affecting us negatively. It's important to provide some context, some understanding as to why a university has taken a particular action or why it has to defend a particular faculty member's right to say something or do something. Universities occupy a very special place in society. This is one of the few places where controversial issues are discussed openly and where all points of view are invited." -- John Burness, Duke University Senior Vice President for Public Affairs

Burness Flips Off the LAX Families

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KC Johnson: Channeling Selena Roberts

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LS Forum: Burness will NOT apologize!

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Burness Email

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LS Forum: Lacrosse Players Asked University to Apologize

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Carrington and Schoeffel Interview

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KC Johnson: Carrington, Schoeffel Speak Out

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Michael Gustafson: A Bad Read

The Award for Consistently Getting It Wrong Goes To...

Up Yours!

Lara Loves the Hoax

It's a challenge I'll admit it!

She's tough to canonize!

What a pity ALL that DNA

Is from ALL those other guys!

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But it's the duty of the media

To let agenda obscure fact!

Despite all the hideous challenges...

We must keep Crystal's victim hood intact!

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Sister Samiha set the course for us.

Strippings a "performance obligation."

And Crystal's comments ripping Kim

Were suppressed to advance creation

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Of a shy-new-dancer, sweet persona

That was Oh, so far from fact!

But we were committed from the beginning

To keep Crystal's victim hood intact.

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When the neighbors tried to tell the truth

Our little college friend did a save,

Wouldn't report the "unsavory" details

Of the wayward pole-dancing maid.

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Suppression, omission of all we've learned

Need to keep "Our Agenda" clear.

Do you like my one sided propaganda piece?

Keeping Crystal's victim hood revered?

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We don't care too much for truth.

We don't need to state the facts

All that exculpatory evidence

Just takes OUR storyline off track.

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Boo! Hoo! Pole dancer's traumatized!

Strangers scare her so!

Don't MENTION she handled strangers well...

Up on motel row,

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So if she can't express herself

Maybe the surroundings don't suit her vibe!

Send the SP's to the Platinum Club!

Help us keep Crystal's victim hood ALIVE!

Joan Foster

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Related:

Lara Setrakian, Agendist Poseur Crystal Mess

The Uncooperative Accuser Durham in Wonderland

EXCLUSIVE: Accuser Not Answering Investigators' Key Questions... Lara Setrakian, ABC News

Cooper: Lacrosse Accuser 'Cooperative' WRAL

Dean Sue Gets Off Her Chair

Dean Sue Gets Off Her Chair

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It only took a year, my friends, to get Dean Sue off her chair.

It only took a year for a small gesture that she cares.

Those vigilante posters SUDDENLY have poor Dean Sue distressed...

Dean Sue is "completely motivated to make sure this is adequately addressed!"

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Think back to when the posters were on every campus tree...

Inflaming passions so very negative, some players had to flee!

Did Dean Sue castigate the wording, the very guilt they seemed to stress?

Oh well...NOW she's "completely motivated to make sure this is adequately addressed!"

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As a board member of Crimestoppers did she publicly decry

The pronouncement of MOST CERTAIN GUILT...or ask who? or what or why?

Did she ever have a moments care, that the team faced such duress?

Hallelujah!, NOW, she's "completely motivated to make sure this is adequately addressed!"

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I liked to say respectfully, it's too little..,much too late.

A day late, and a dollar short...to step up to the plate.

Your betrayal, and your callousness...ah-h-h...but I digress...

At LONG last, Dean Sue is "completely motivated to make sure this is adequately addressed!"

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You didn't speak when the boys were smeared on those posters far and wide.

You didn't speak when all the world was inflamed by Fantastic Lies

NOW, YOUR name has been appearing in the blogs and in the press!

NO doubt it's made you"completely motivated to make sure this is adequately addressed?"

Joan Foster

Text of the original CrimeStoppers "Wanted" poster courtesy of John in Carolina:

What follows is the full text of the first “Wanted” poster taken from a faxed poster copy with a header containing Durham Police Department in large letters superimposed against a background that included a police officer's shield, the Durham skyline, and the Durham City logo.

On Monday, March 13,2006 about 11:00pm, the Duke University Lacrosse Team solicited a local escort service for entertainment. The victim was paid to dance at the residence located at 610 Buchanan. The Duke Lacrosse Team was hosting a party at the residence. The victim was sodomized, raped, assaulted and robbed. This horrific crime sent shock waves throughout our community. Durham Police needs your assistance in solving this case. We are asking anyone who has any information related to this case, please contact lnv. Himan at 560-4582 x229.

Information can also be provided anonymously through Durham CrimeStoppers at 683-1200 or by email to david.addison@durhamnc.gov (Please use an anonymous email account). Durham CrimeStoppers will pay cash for any information which leads to an arrest in this case.

John in Carolina's Crime Stoppers/Addison Series:

• “Addison Series #1" - "This horrific crime”
• "Addison Series #2" - "CrimeStoppers will pay cash"
• "Addison Series #3" - "Not my poster"
• “Addison Series #4 – “They call it ‘squeezing.’”
• "Addison Series # 5 – “Major Duke Involvement"

KC Johnson's Crime Stoppers/Addison/Duke Series:

• "Addison, CrimeStoppers and Duke"
• "CrimeStoppers Update"
• "CrimeStoppers’ Board"
• "CrimeStoppers Follow-Up"

Hoax Day

Nifonged

Clueless

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Several months ago, District Attorney Mike Nifong released his expert witness list to the attorneys defending against his Hoax. At the time, it appeared curious that two experts from DNA Security, Inc. were listed among the expected witnesses. Considering the limited amount of DNA evidence revealed at the time, it appeared unlikely that the State would find significant value in presenting the opinions of two experts from DNA Security. According to the report provided by DNA Security, it appeared that the only DNA evidence to be addressed would be the non-exclusion of David Evans’ DNA from the DNA recovered from his bathroom trashcan and the DNA matched to the accuser’s boyfriend from her vaginal swab.

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Considering that Dr. Brian Meehan was already on record as dismissing the value of the Evans' non-exclusion, it was even more difficult to decipher the anticipated expert testimony.

"A DNA link is not clear cut with the type of test used in this case, DNA experts told ABC News. ABC News spoke with DNA analysts, including Brian Meehan, head of DNA Security, the Burlington, N.C. laboratory that conducted the set of tests used in the case. All of the analysts agreed that the most one could say about a specific person — the alleged third attacker in the Duke rape investigation — was that he could not be ruled out, but also could not be definitively ruled in." ABC News

Noting that, by law, the District Attorney was prevented from fluffing up his witness list with experts he did not reasonably expect to call, the puzzle became slightly more complicated.

“Give notice to the defendant of any expert witnesses that the State reasonably expects to call as a witness at trial. Each such witness shall prepare, and the State shall furnish to the defendant, a report of the results of any examinations or tests conducted by the expert. The State shall also furnish to the defendant the expert's curriculum vitae, the expert's opinion, and the underlying basis for that opinion. The State shall give the notice and furnish the materials required by this subsection within a reasonable time prior to trial, as specified by the court.” § 15A‑903. (2)

The events of the past few days, however, have given some clarity to the issue. It appears that the experts from DNA Security will be called by District Attorney Mike Nifong not to validate their scientific findings but rather to debunk the science of DNA and the merits of their own laboratory. In what appears to be professional suicide, Dr. Brian Meehan gave a preview of what we might expect his testimony to resemble if the Hoax endures to trial. To explain how no DNA could be left behind by the suspects in the course of a thirty minute, brutal, condom-less gang rape, Dr. Meehan offered this explanation:

"A person can rob a bank and never leave a fingerprint; it doesn’t mean they didn’t rob a bank.”

We fully expect that Dr. Meehan will offer an equally non-scientific explanation for how he concluded that the overwhelming amount of unidentified DNA was somehow irrelevant.

While we have no idea what the second expert, Dr. Bo Scales, will be expected to testify to, we are curious to know if he was involved at all in the DNA testing or the analysis of the results. Dr. Scales is listed as DNA Security's technical leader but it appears that Dr. Scales may be a “technical leader” in name only. Considering that Dr. Scales serves as the director of his own laboratory in Brandon, Mississippi, the following comments from a recent article on Dr. Meehan may be quite telling.

"In 2003, Meehan decided he wanted to expand the company and get into forensic DNA testing, which is used in criminal investigations and court cases.

"Doing so meant Meehan's small lab had to be certified by the American Society of Crime Laboratory Directors/ Laboratory Accreditation Board so that results of any tests he did would be admissible in court. While Meehan had the technical expertise -- he had worked in forensic DNA at National Legal Labs -- there were still plenty of hoops for his small company to jump through.

"He teamed up with another scientist in Mississippi who also ran a small DNA lab, and the two of them agreed to act as "technical leaders" for each other's companies. Having a technical leader was part of the certification requirement." Triangle Biz

According to the standards set by the FBI, a technical manager is defined as:

"Technical manager or leader (or equivalent position or title as designated by the laboratory director) is the individual who is accountable for the technical operations of the laboratory." FBI

There does not appear to be any requirement that the technical leader actually work on-site but rather they simply accept accountability for the technical operations of the lab. One can only wonder if that accountability extends to ensuring that the technical operations prevent the lab director from contaminating samples with his own DNA. Dr. Meehan concedes that this contamination undermines his own lab's credibility.

“Brad Bannon asked Meehan to discuss the concept of “transference.” Meehan feigned ignorance, so Bannon explained how the transference of one or two cells—from, say, intermingling in a trashcan, or through a spec of dandruff—can lead to finding a partial match of someone’s DNA on an item.

“The example he cited: Meehan’s own DNA, which was found on one of the items in the rape kit. Meehan conceded that this discovery (which he didn’t include in his initial “report”) undermined his lab’s credibility. And, of course, the theory offers the likely explanation for the partial match to Dave Evans’ DNA, on a fingernail that was in a trashcan in Evans’ bathroom.” KC Johnson

Considering the mutual back scratching arrangement that gives Dr. Meehan accountability for technical operations at Scales Biological Laboratory Scales Biological Laboratory, his ineptitude and apparent disdain for the science of DNA would also appear to call into question the credibility of Dr. Scales' lab. KC Johnson is reporting that the agency responsible for accreditation of DNA labs has agreed to investigate DNA Security, Inc.

“In last Friday’s court session, Dr. Brian Meehan admitted that he and Mike Nifong entered into an agreement to intentionally exclude from his report any mention that DNA tests had discovered results from five unidentified males in the accuser’s rape kit.

"Meehan also conceded that the decision reached by Nifong and him violated his company’s protocols. It also ran counter to the Supreme Court’s Brady decision and North Carolina’s Open Discovery law. The former requires the state to turn over all exculpatory evidence to the defense; the latter requires the prosecution to turn over all evidence to the defense.

“Despite this revelation, there has been no sign that the North Carolina State Bar has abandoned its passive approach regarding Nifong’s misconduct. Meehan, however, might face a different fate.

“His lab is accredited by the American Society of Crime Laboratory Directors/Laboratory Accreditation Board (ASCLD/LAB). I emailed the board to ask if it planned to investigate Meehan’s accreditation status in light of Friday’s testimony. Executive Director Ralph Keaton responded,

“As the accrediting body for the laboratory in question, ASCLD/LAB will
conduct a review of the issue in question. ASCLD/LAB is aware of the ongoing legal process and will take that into consideration in determining
the appropriate time to review the circumstances.” KC Johnson

Since it is unknown to what degree Dr. Scales has participated, or intends to participate, in the Meehan-Nifong Conspiracy, it is unclear whether a review of Dr. Scales' lab accreditation appears to be warranted as well. One thing that is certain, however, is that Dr. Meehan’s inept reporting and complicity in the conspiracy to deceive the public and withhold evidence from the defense has raised the ire of his peers.

Forensic Talk’s Dr. Kathleen Eckelt shares her displeasure and that of another esteemed colleague at her website:

“No matter what field we are in, when colleagues fail to follow standard protocols and / or behave in an unethical or unprofessional manner, it sheds a bad light on all of us. The rest of us have worked too long and hard to create and maintain standards of protocol, to maintain our credibility, and our professionalism.

“Those in the forensics field don't appreciate having a profession they take pride in being placed in an unfair light or subjected to scorn and redicule (sic) because a small number choose to forget what professionalism is all about.

"Brent Turvey, of Forensic Solutions LLC, is a forensics scientist, criminal profiler, and consultant. He is the author of several forensics books including, Criminal Profiling, Rape Investigation Handbook, Criminal Profiling: An Introduction to Behavioral Evidence Analysis, and Crime Reconstruction.

"I contacted Brent after reading his posts and requested further comments.

"Kathleen ... State prosecutorial agencies, and those in their employ, have a duty to disclose ALL potentially exculpatory evidence to the defense, per Brady v. Maryland. What Dr. Meehan has admitted to, under oath, is that he personally conspired with prosecutors to conceal actual exculpatory findings from the defense. He has further testified that this is a violation of his own lab's policies - policies that he would have written. There is no good reason for such conduct, and there can be no excuses for such conduct. Moreover, Dr. Meehan has admitted to contaminating suspect samples with his own DNA. In other words, his house is not in order from a scientific perspective. A full investigation by ASCLD, the agency that certifies his lab, is warranted.

"This is no small matter for Dr. Meehan, or the private forensic lab industry. Dr. Meehan's conduct in this case has single-handedly demonstrated that privately funded and operated forensic labs are just as easily influenced by zealous prosecutors as their government lab counterparts.

"And to the question, "Have you ever willfully conspired with the prosecution to conceal evidence that you to be exculpatory?" - he must forever answer yes, while under oath in future cases. For many in the forensic science community, this would be a career headshot. - Brent" Forensic Talk

As a final note of curiosity regarding Dr. Meehan, it has been reported that DNA Security has not performed any public work prior to being contracted for the Hoax.

“DNA Security had done no public work, whether for a judge, district attorney, public defender or court appointed lawyer, according to financial records of the Administrative Office of the Courts dating to January 2002.” N&O

It appears that this report is not entirely accurate. Recently, DNASI hosted a two day workshop for crime scene investigators from Alamance County and other law enforcement agencies from across the country.

“Was it Colonel Mustard in the kitchen with the knife, or Mrs. White in the study with the gun?

“These were some of the questions crime scene investigators were asking themselves at DNA Security Labs crime scene training this week in Burlington, where they gathered for in-depth and forensic training.

“The two dozen investigators from across the country found that, without DNA analysis, solving a crime scene is a lot like playing Clue.” Times-News

Given the revelations of the past few days, these investigators would have been better served playing Clue than training with Dr. Meehan who quite obviously doesn’t have one.

The Relevance of Nancy’s disGrace

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It’s easy to see the SNL skit with Amy Poehler skewering Nancy Grace as a joke and a throwaway effort at cheap laughs. However, the recent revelations concerning the collusion between DNA Securities and DA Nifong to withhold exculpatory DNA evidence in the Hoax makes skewering Grace particularly timely. No one led the cries of condemnation and the effort to convict the lacrosse players before any investigation more than Nancy Grace. We previously reviewed many of her ridiculous assertions in a nomination of Grace for Hag of the Hoax.

Reviewing those statements again, one group of comments stands out as particularly relevant. In all the discussions this past Friday regarding whether Brian Meehan or DA Nifong was more responsible for hiding DNA results, it was forgotten that Nifong’s office not only provided an incomplete report to the defense, but also leaked an incomplete and false account to the press. The day before Meehan’s May 12th letter was delivered to Detective Himan, "well placed sources" and "sources close to the investigation" told the Herald-Sun and other media outlets that there was a positive DNA match to a lacrosse player.

"Tissue found under the fingernail of an exotic dancer who claimed she was raped at a Duke University lacrosse party may match a player who was at the party, sources told a North Carolina newspaper Wednesday.

"The Durham Herald-Sun reports that scientists who analyzed the tissue concluded it came from the same genetic pool and was "consistent" with the bodily makeup of one of 46 lacrosse players who gave DNA samples for testing. Scientists ruled out a possible match with any of the other 45 students, sources told the newspaper." CBS News May 11, 2006

"Prosecutors believe they have DNA evidence to tie a third Duke lacrosse player to the alleged attack of a 27-year-old exotic dancer, sources close to the investigation tell ABC News." ABC News May 11, 2006

"Tissue found under the fingernail of an exotic dancer who claimed she was raped at a Duke University lacrosse party may match a player who was there, several well-placed sources said Wednesday.

"Analyzing the tissue, scientists concluded it came from the same genetic pool and was “consistent” with the bodily makeup of one of 46 lacrosse players who gave DNA samples for testing, the sources said." Herald Sun May 11, 2006

"After a first set of DNA tests failed to link two lacrosse players to the alleged crime, it was widely considered that DNA evidence would not be part of the case. New results from this second round of testing will help the prosecution's case, sources close to the investigation say.

"New DNA Tests 'Helpful' to Prosecution

"The potential evidence - a DNA sample found under a fake fingernail worn by the alleged victim and linked to the lacrosse player - was recovered from the off-campus home where the alleged attack took place." WTVD May 11, 2006

This leak of information apparently known only to Dr. Meehan's lab and District Attorney Nifong's office, the false presentation of the non-exclusion as a match or possible match, and the withholding of the clear exculpatory findings combined to create an uproar by making it appear that the additional DNA testing revealed incriminating evidence rather than proof positive of exoneration. In response to this public fraud, no one was more excited than Nancy Grace. On her May 11th show she celebrated the new evidence and practically declared it proof of guilt.

"Well, it all looked bleak for the prosecution of the Duke lacrosse team multiple rape case. At the 11th hour, suddenly, a Hail Mary pass was thrown, and it's a touchdown for the state! Apparently, DNA matching one of these three lacrosse players has turned up under the nails of the student-turned-stripper." Nancy Grace May 11, 2006

Transforming a clearly devastating report, exonerating the lacrosse players, into a “touchdown for the state” was precisely Nifong and Meehan’s intent and precisely what Nancy Grace, the Herald-Sun and others enabled them to do. The Herald-Sun willingly was the first to report one small piece of a much larger report in order to incite the local and national media into a frenzy over a “match” to a plastic fingernail found in a trashcan.

We now know that the "match" was not really a match and was rather an inability to exclude Dave Evans. The DNA came not from under a fingernail but from a mixture created from multiple fake nails retrieved from Dave Evans' own bathroom trashcan. In addition, hidden in the Meehan-Nifong conspiracy were the matches to numerous unknown other males not on the lacrosse team. One day later, on Friday May 12th the defense was informed in the report that there was genetic material matching the accuser’s “boyfriend” found in her vagina, but no mention was made of the other matches to other males in the accuser’s pubic area, on her panties, and in her anal cavity. The press and the public remained unaware of these matches, and many continued to hold onto the manufactured belief that the trashcan DNA had import, until last week’s defense motion followed by Meehan's in court confession.

Meehan's intentionally incomplete report was delivered to Inv. Himan on Friday, May 12th. Dave Evans was indicted on Monday, May 15th. One can only wonder what the grand jury would have said had the full results of the test been revealed.

It is deeply ironic that the Hoax enablers, Wendy Murphy in particular (is she really back?), dismissed the negative DNA results back in April and May and asserted there was more in the reports than the defense attorneys were revealing. Nifong himself jumped on this train for a while (after previously stating to the News & Observer that, “[i]f the only thing that we ever have in this case is DNA, then we wouldn't have a case."). Nifong chastised Susannah Meadows of Newsweek for believing the defense attorneys when they said the DNA reports exonerated the players, a claim that Nifong described as “preposterous.” In fact, just the opposite was true. There was more to the DNA reports, but it was the testing facility and the District Attorney that had conspired to keep this evidence from the defense and the press.

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Apparently Nancy Grace and the Herald-Sun are choosing to believe this manipulation and deception never happened. Other networks appear oblivious as well. FoxNews and WRAL are currently attempting to pretend they didn’t report and “confirm” the accuser had given birth last Thursday, when in fact she is not due until February.

This pattern of manipulative and false leaks from the prosecution is not something new nor has it been something difficult to recognize. We have seen it from the very first day of this Hoax when the police claimed the lacrosse players were not cooperating and were hiding behind of a wall of silence. We watched it continue through the manufactured racial outrage created by the 911 hoax. We've witnessed false hints of date rape drugs, false contentions of condoms and long sleeve shirts worn to prevent the transfer of evidence, false promises and invented assertions in affidavits, fabricated theories of the Hoax, contrived lineup procedures, the release of a retracted affidavit, and more. We have outlined many of these Hoaxes within the Hoax on these pages over the past several months.

Hoax Within A Hoax
Another Hoax Within A Hoax
Yet Another Hoax Within A Hoax
Hijacker of the Hoax
An Affiant's Belief (Fake Names, Fake Teams Hoax)
Enabling the Hoax
A Conspiracy of Truth (Wall of Silence Hoax)

Nancy Grace was ripe to be ridiculed for her willing cooperation and facilitation of the hoax. She should not be the last member of the media skewered for their role in this fiasco. As shown in court on Friday, Nifong could not have accomplished this persecution on his own.

The Good News Is...

"When requesting documents for discovery, it may be important to consider the privacy of all the individuals that were included in DNA testing for this case." - Response to the Court written by Dr. Brian Meehan, at the request of DA Nifong.

LS Forum: Lab Director's DNA Found Where?

da's Train Wreck Express

Illustration by Baldo & Neonknightmare

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LS Forum: da's Train Wreck Express

.LS Forum: The Riddler Strikes Again

.WTVD Forum: "In a few says, the Earth will shake..."

..

"The Earth Will Shake"

Song by: Thrice

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we dream of ways to break these iron bars

we dream of black nights without moon or stars

we dream of tunnels and of sleeping guards

we dream of blackouts in the prison yard

.

heartbroken, we found

(a gleam of hope)

harken to the sound,

(a whistle blows)

heaven sent reply,

(however small)

evidence of life

(beyond these walls)

born and bred

(in this machine)

wardens dread

(to see us dream)

we hold tight

(to legends of)

real life,

(the way it was before)

.

we dream of jailers throwing down their arms

we dream of open gates and no alarms

.

we dream of ways to break these iron bars

we dream of black nights without moon or stars

we dream of ways to break these iron bars

we dream of black nights without moon or stars

we dream of ways to break these iron bars

we dream of black nights without moon or stars

heartbroken, we found

(a gleam of hope)

harken to the sound,

(a whistle blows)

heaven sent reply,

(however small)

evidence of life

(beyond these walls)

born and bred

(in this machine)

wardens dread

(to see us dream)

we hold tight

(to legends of)

real life,

(the way it was before)

.

look to the day the earth will shake

these weathered walls will fall away

.

look to the day the earth will shake
these weathered walls will fall away

.

look to the day the earth will shake
these weathered walls will fall away

.

look to the day the earth will shake
these weathered walls will fall away

.

.

.The Prophet's Song
by Queen

Oh oh people of the earth, listen to the warning the seer he said

Beware the storm that gathers here, listen to the wise man

...

From mother's love is the son estranged, married his own his precious gain

The earth will shake in two will break, and death all round will be your dowry

.

Oh oh people of the earth, listen to the warning the seer he said

For those who hear and mark my words, Listen to the good plan

Oh oh oh oh, and two by two, my human zoo, (they'll be)

Running for to come, running for to come, out of the rain

...

Ah people can you hear me?

And now I know, and now I know

And now I know, and now I know

That you can hear me

And now I know and now I know

And now I know now I know

Now I know, now I know

Now I know, now I know

Now I know The earth will shake, in two will break

...

Now I know, now I know

Now I know, now I know

Now I know, now I know

Now I know, now I know

Now I know, now I know

Now I know

Wo, wo, wo, wo, wo, wo, wo, wo, wo

.

Listen to the wise, listen to the wise, listen to the wise

Listen to the wise, listen to the wise, man

La, la

La, la, la, la, la, la

La, la, la, la, la, la

La, la, la, la, la, la

La, la, la, la, la, la

La, la, la, la, la, la

La, la, la, la, la, la

La, la

La, la

La, la

Come here, I hear you

Come here, I hear you

Come here, I hear you

Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah

Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah

...

Listen to the man, listen to the man, listen to the man, listen to the mad man

God gave you grace to purge this place

And peace all around may be your fortune

Oh oh children of the land, love is still the answer take my hand

The vision fades a voice I hear, listen to the madman!

But still I fear and still I dare not, laugh at the madman!

A Gift From The Blogs

Thanksgiving Turkeys

Brodhead's Morning Briefing

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Good Morning, President Brodhead.

Did you enjoy your Cheerios?

Ready for your morning briefing, Dick?

Everything you need to know!

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Prof Crowley wrote to the Herald Sun.

Unfortunately, he signed his name.

He wandered off the talking points.

It really was a shame.

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Time and again we've told them, Dick,

To avoid this consternation

The trinity is... "American Pyscho,"

Racial Slurs, and Urination!

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Gosh, Dick, do you think they'll ever learn?

Yes, he did just what we feared.

Tried to take on K.C. Johnson.

Called Cheshire some guy "with a beard."

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Said his "source" that the kids were racists,

(are you ready for this one?)

Was "some article he read somewhere!"

No, Dick...I don't have your Tums.

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Hey, look on the bright side.

At least Crowley did not opine

About our co-eds giving "hook-up"

Like Rosenberg did that memorable time.

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Dick, don't look at me like that...

Please don't "Et tu, Brute?" me.

At least Crowley's stuff is readable

Unlike Holloways tortured screeds.

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The alumni E-mails are pouring in...

Will they still donate and bequeath?

Your fancy footwork is falling flat.

Dick, please don't grind your teeth.

.

As for our fine feathered faculty,

My suggestion for the day?

Let's tell Ashley at the Herald Snooze

Ye Gads! Don't print anything THEY say!

Joan Foster

Prosecutors Gone Wild

Transcript: On The Record with Greta 11/08/2006

Transcript: On The Record with Greta 11/14/2006

Paul Hue discusses Greta's Legal Panel

da's Pots & Pans

Character

It Won't Be Easy

Dream Team