Wednesday, December 06, 2006

How the Fong Stole Christmas

Every Lad in Lacrosseville
Liked Christmas a lot.
But the Fong,
Who lived in Durhamville,
Most certainly...did not!
The Fong hated Christmas!
The whole Christmas season.
He hated the Lads though it wasn't one reason.
It could have been envy, or he was a bad sport.
It could have been a lifetime stuck in traffic court.
It could have been spite, or a lack of life's graces.
.Or simply these fine lads had no moles on their faces...
.But last Christmas for Fong was most horrid of all.
Last Christmas, the Fong feared he might take a fall...
.His heart started shrinking.
Yes, shrinking in fear...
The primary was coming,
Yes, coming next year!
And the Fong feared the election,
The votes to be cast...
Because in Durhamville was the real Ghost....
Of the Fong's Christmas past!
.Her name was Freda...but she was no friend.
And the Fong had a fear that his career just might end.
.So as Christmas was ending and he watched New Year's floats...
The Fong was wondering..."How will I get votes?!!"
I fired Freda and turnabouts big...I might have to return to my social work gig!
The snow had all melted and the Spring had arrived.
The Fong's polls were pathetic...he wouldn't survive...
When what to his wondering eyes should appear?
But THE PERFECT Scenario midnight so clear.
The Lads in Lacrossville made a poor party plan...
And decided to invite some strippers to dance.
And though Kim called it a" crock" when asked what she "thunk,"
And the cop said that Precious was just "passed out drunk,"
And many other details in the whole story stunk...
The Fong now had what he needed and would most dearly WANT!
The Fong didn't care if she said five or twenty.
He would just pick any story...she surely had plenty!
He was certain he'd get him some good DNA
When he didn't...he shrugged...Don't need that anyway!
And when two different times, the line-up dismayed her...
He made sure she'd pick someone, So he made them all PLAYERS!
The Fong went on Greta, and on Nancy Grace.
Turn on your TV...the Fong's all over the place.
And though he hadn't even spoken to the Accuser in question,
Or even done ANY kind of investigation...
To get the votes and endorsements he desired,
He indicted three Lads...'cause that's WHAT was required.
And so Fong was elected, (but more voted for others)
Then Christmas returned...and the Fong's frozen heart shuddered...
The Fong wondered why he still hated the season.
He'd railroaded the that should have been pleasin'
And he smirked and insulted the defense fuddy-duddys...
And neither Judge ever stopped him...what very good buddies!
He'd stolen their Spring, their Summer and Fall.
Perhaps stealing their Christmas would be grandest of all!
Yes, he hoped to steal Christmas from the Lads and their friends
And that should make the tiny Fong-heart...finally expand.
But, nothing was joyful, not holly or elf...
For the truth is...the Fong...was stuck with himself.
For every vote he'd paid a very large price.
It put a pain in his Fong heart, now covered with ice.
And now on the talk shows, most reasonable lawyers,
Thought his case and his methods were prosecutorial horrors...
And behind the holly wreaths on many Durhamville doors...
The Fong's reputation would never be restored.
THEN...from way up in Lacrosseville...a sound could be heard!!!
The Fong was so startled...he said not a word.
The lads were still singing...singing the old Christmas songs!!!
And the folks who support them were singing along!!!
And their families, and fathers, and sisters and brothers,
The bloggers, and posters, and girlfriends, and Mothers!!
No false accusation, nor the guile of the Fong
Could keep Christmas from coming...coming so strong.
And in the midst of the circle stood Dave, Collin, and Reade.
And the lesson of Christmas, yes, each Christmas Eve...
Is that though Grinches, and Fongs, like the dark of the night,
Bring darkness upon us...we believe in the Light!
We believe in Goodness! We believe in Friends! We believe that Truth and Innocence wins!
And Sometimes Santa can bring something so shocking...
Let's pray for the Feds in the Fong's Christmas stocking.

Joan Foster
Illustration by Baldo


Anonymous said...

Wow, your work is terrific. Thanks for another excellent piece of writing. Great job - I loved it!

Anonymous said...

Another classic Joan!

Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...

You just brightened my day. I pray for December 15th to be the best Christmas present ever: Truth and Justice for Reade, Colin and Dave and their families.

Anonymous said...

Thank you Liestoppers!!!

Loved it. The truth within makes this poem.

Thank you!

Anonymous said...

The Fong who Stole Christmas! I love it!

So who would be Fong's little dog? Himan? Gottlieb?

Anonymous said...

Why go after DA Nifong he is doing his job, prosecuting rapist. Maybe you would prefer he prosecute, the victims instead.

joan foster said...


He is prosecuting the "victims."
The "victims" are Collin, Reade and Dave.

Anonymous said...

Boy are you confused, Joan, they are under indictment, by the State of North Carolin for rape, kidnapping and sexual assault. They will be found guilty of at least one of those charges, the jury will make sure of that. Don't worry though, I hear the NC prison system has college opportunities. I think it is disgusting that 3 big white guys attacked a petite black female, trying to make money to feed her children and get a college degree.

Anonymous said...

Wow 5:46...ease off the brown liquor, man!! When you combine that with your crack, it can really screw up your mind!

Anonymous said...

What crack, the only crack here, are the crackpots here that think there won't be a trial and the 3 indicted players should walk.

gc said...

It's probably your best poem ever. Thank you Joan.

Anonymous said...

Too bad Boris Karloff still isn't alive to play the Fong's voice...

Anonymous said...

I'm serious 6:43....those drugs and excessive drinking will really mess up your mind and body...if you keep this up, pretty soon you'll actually start believing yourself.

gwallan said...

Why go after DA Nifong he is doing his job, prosecuting rapist.
Assumes guilt.

Boy are you confused, Joan, they are under indictment, by the State of North Carolin for rape, kidnapping and sexual assault.
By your own words "under indictment". Not "guilty" as you prefer to assume and claim.

What crack, the only crack here, are the crackpots here that think there won't be a trial and the 3 indicted players should walk.
Half right. There MUST be a trial but they WILL walk. Hopefully we can then move on to the trials of Nifong and the liar...oops, sorry, accuser - the real offenders here.

Anonymous said...

Pray tell

Why do you love the lies being told here? Mike Nifong is "NOT" railroading innocent people. A prosecutor has a DUTY to protect the citizens of Durham from rapist. That is why the voters put him in office. He is the BEST man for the job. Get use to it!

All the "PROTEST" is because Mike Nifong is prosecuting rich white boys v a poor black woman. I'm certain of that without a doubt. Stop telling lies on this board about Mike Nifong.

Start "now" denouncing the duke 3 and lacrosse players bad behavior:

1. Raping Kidnapping & Sexual Assaulting a woman
2. Degrading and Exploiting women for their own sadistic sexual satisfaction
3. Having NO morals at all
4. Encouraging minors to break the law
5. Having NO respect for law enforcement
6. Lying about what happened that night
7. Using racial slurs to injure 2 women
8. Disrespecting Duke University
9. Bringing shame on their coach
10.Embarrassing their girlfriends and families
11.Deceiving the public
12. Disrespecting their neighbors


Start encourging the duke 3 to apologize for their actions and confess their sins!

don t. said...

Priceless! Absolutely priceless!! By the way, 5:46 and 6:43 are (is?) chain pullers trying to get attention. Ignore them.

duke09parent said...

9:20 is Yolanda Carrington of Raleigh. She has a marxist website at if you would like to read more of her junk. She believes that a woman who alleges rape is entitled to be believed without regard to anything else. She also believes that reverse racism is not possible because it is impossible for the dominated minority to be racist against the dominant majority.

What's almost surprising is how few people comment on her essays. She will never address the substance of any argument you make that does not fit her world view, no matter what evidence you cite. She's been a troll here and on DIW of late. Prof. Anderson called her out after I suggested who it was and she didn't deny it.

The writing styles match, including the use of CAPITALS every ten words or so.

bill anderson said...

Yolanda is "visiting" the Durham-in-Wonderland site, too. As I pointed out before, her "logic" demands the conclusion that the jury in the Scottsboro Boys trial reached a just and correct verdict.

Why? Because a woman alleged rape against men. According to Yolanda, no woman EVER has lied about rape, and no woman EVER has made a wrongful identification.

You see, according to Yolanda, whose views echo those of the Gang of 88 at Duke, the Innocents Project -- which has been instrumental in freeing a large number of black men wrongfully convicted of rape and other crimes -- really needs to be shut down, since by definition it disrespects women.

This, dear readers, is the upshot of the kind of marxist feminism that we see at Duke and elsewhere. It requires that we believe lies, tell lies, and live complete lies.

By the way, would any of you want to face a jury full of Yolandas, who declare that there is no such thing as a fact? Yes, there is only ideology with people like her.

As long as she is on her blog site, she is nothing but a marxist shill. Place her in a position of power, like a jury, and she is the picture of wrongdoing.

Anonymous said...


I must tell you that I am NOT Y Carrington. Such idiots! You assume too much. And you know what that means.

And let me inform you that Y Carrington could care less for your a**.

Anonymous said...

Joan, you are truly a blessing in all of this--thank you for the devotion you have to helping these guys!

Anonymous said...

11:59 hee hee... oh I think you ARE Yolanda... hee hee hee you are quite a joke! Thank God you are black, because that is the only thing you can fall back on to support your auguments. If you didn't have that "race card" in your deck you would have nothing.

bill anderson said...

Yolanda's denial is consistent with Yolanda's folk marxism. After all, marxists have argued for more than a century, there is no truth, only political power. Thus, if a lie serves the "cause," then a lie really is the truth.

Look, I am not being facetious. That is what they believe and have preached at us for 100 years. You see, Yolanda believes that a rape conviction is good for the "cause," so facts should never get in the way.

Anonymous said...

Bill Anderson

Even you are stooping so low! Waaaaay wrong again. You just keep losing! It's not going to get any better either!

gwallan said...

Start "now" denouncing the duke 3 and lacrosse players bad behavior

Better yet start denouncing silly feminists(all of them). Get on the bandwagon folks. They're a dying breed with nothing positive to contribute.

Their silliness is exemplified here. Blind belief in an accusation based on nothing more than genitalia is their hallmark. They need to realise that this accuser is not their ally. Unfortunately they do not have the nous. Their hatred for men overwhelms their capacity for logic(which was always minimal anyway).

Anonymous said...

joan, you should know by now all your little poems(you suck by the way) and insulting cartoons WILL NOT WORK. They did not work during the election and they are not working now. i agree with the poster who posted above that the only reason you all are posting againist nifong is that he dared to bring charges againist some white rich males on the word of a white female and your racist asses cannot tolerate that at all and so you are attacking nifong. the accuser, the black community because that was not supposed to happen. your motives are racist pure and simple and no amount of arguing about justice,etc can cover up this fact. the fact of the matter is there are no standing websites you have created decrying blacks being railroaded by nifong. you could care less; you only care about the lacrosse players BECAUSE THEY ARE WHITE MALE ELITES and you could give a damn about the rest of the people being railroaded in Durhm or else where.

Anonymous said...

i meant to say black female above.

bill anderson said...

I guess that Yolanda has spoken. She wants everyone to go to prison.

By the way, Yolanda, Ms. Foster's goddaughter is black. Are you saying she hates her own goddaughter?

As I read the comments by Yolanda and the other, I can see that they are driven by hatred and nothing else. We see the same evasions each time when someone asks for evidence. They declare that DNA is invalid because it contradicts Nifong's charges.

I guess they need to contact the Innocents Project and to tell them that the people exonerated for rape and other charges due to DNA must be put back into prison. If DNA is not permitted to be a factor here, then it cannot be permitted to be a factor anywhere.

I do not doubt that you and the black community of Durham are capable of railroading innocent people into prison. You have declared that to be your goal, and so be it. But if you are going to accuse Joan Foster of being a racist, then I suspect you had better contact her goddaughter and tell her that Joan hates her, too.

Anonymous said...


You mention "the rest of the people being railroaded in Durhm." Are there very many others currently being railroaded in "Durhm?" Is this a common occurance, some type of sport y'all play there? Of "the rest of the people being railroaded in Durham," who and how many do you care about? Is there a blog you've set up to champion the cause of "the rest of the people being railroaded in Durham?" Is there anyone doing anything to help "the rest of the people being railroaded in Durham?" Rather than hollering hatred at Joan maybe you should ask her to help "the rest of the people being railroaded in Durham?" Logically speaking, if the three Dukies are the ones being railroaded not included in "the rest of the people being railroaded in Durham," you have just admited that you know they are being railroad. Could you please tell us again who is the racist among us?

joan foster said...

10:50 AM
I hope that the end result of this case is that more people will be aware of what the minority communities have been trying to tell us for they have suffered in this very way.

I think you care very much. I do too. I care about the things you are talking about. In a better world.. we could direct our energies to making things better for your children and mine and the kids to come.I work every day in my community to do that. I hope someday that time will come.

We should have the websites and boards you talk about.We should try to make that happen. On my part, I am willing to try. I know the rest of the Liestoppers would be wiling to try. And Bill Anderson certainly would be willing to try.

I wish you blessings in this holiday season...and pray that the New Year will bring us all better understanding of one another.